Revision

Original

On the eve of my 16th birthday, I could barely sit still. In a mere few hours, I was going to embark on a whole new part of my life. I was going to learn how to drive. This birthday marked the beginning of the process to get my permit. Exactly one year later, I was excited beyond words. It was the eve of me getting my license. After a whole year of driving with stickler parents, I could almost taste the freedom I was about to possess. However a year after that, all excitement had gone out the window. On the eve of my 18th birthday, I couldn’t think of a single exciting freedom that this landmark age was about to give me. What did I have to look forward to, the ability to get arrested? No thank you. Had I lived in virtually any other country, I would have been able to go have a drink and celebrate with my friends. However the legal drinking age of 21 in the U.S. hindered this potential birthday celebration. I couldn’t help but question this law. If turning 18 made me eligible to do so many other things, why couldn’t I have a drink? Upon further thought, I came to a conclusion. The legal drinking age of 21 in the U.S. is unfair and should be lowered to 18.

Revised

On the eve of my 16th birthday, I could barely sit still. In a few hours, I was going to embark on a whole new part of my life. I was going to learn how to drive. This birthday marked the beginning of the process to get my permit. Exactly one year later, I was excited beyond words. It was the eve of me actually getting my license. After a whole year of driving with stickler parents, I could almost taste the freedom I was about to possess. However a year after that, all excitement had gone out the window. On the eve of my 18th birthday, I couldn’t think of a single exciting freedom that this landmark age was about to give me. What did I have to look forward to, the ability to get arrested? No thank you. Had I lived in virtually any other country, I would have been able to go have a drink and celebrate with my friends. Unfortunately, I live in the U.S. where the drinking age is 21. I couldn’t help but question this law. If turning 18 made me eligible to do so many other things, such as get a tattoo and live on my own, why couldn’t I have a drink? The legal drinking age of 21 in the U.S. is arbitrary and should be lowered to 18 because it is inconsistent with other laws, is not effective, and promotes dangerous drinking practices.